The Auntie's Came to Town (and we went to New York!)

Two weekends ago both my sisters came to town to celebrate Maura's birthday.  We had tons of fun eating, laughing, and playing board games.  Safia especially enjoyed herself, being spoiled by both her aunties at the same time!  Happy Birthday Aunt Maura!  Thanks for visiting Auntie Ray Ray and Auntie Maures, some back soon!

Playing Cards with Auntie Ray

Aunite Ray snuggles

Aunite Maura snuggles 

Playing with Aunite Maura 

You'd think that we'd easily be able to get a picture of all four of us together . . . not as easy as it looks!

Finally a nice one! 

Reading with Iris

Last week, I had a conference in New York, so Rube, Safia, and I all went for a mini (working) vacation.  I had to work all day Friday so Rube and Safia and my mom adventured in the city.  They went to the MOMA (The Museum of Modern Art).  I am told that Safia preferred sculptures to other art forms, and when she really liked a piece she would talk to it (or talk about it, not sure which one) for a long while.  On Saturday, we meet up with my Aunts, Uncles and Cousins at the Natural History Museum, where once again Safia was enthralled by all the exhibits.  She especially liked the animals that she could walk up to and look at herself!  It was so great to get to spend some good quality time with family and friends while we were in New York.  Saturday night, Rube and I left Safia with my mom for the night and went out to dinner with my friend Amanda and my cousin Zach.  We didn't stay out too late, we were in bed by 11:30, but we didn't set an alarm (why would we, Safia always wakes us up) but the next morning at 9:10 we were shocked that we had slept in so long . . . we didn't get to enjoy the bliss too long because I had to get to the conference and Rube had to meet friends for brunch on his way to the airport, but I had forgotten how rested you feel when you get nine hours of uninterrupted sleep!  I think Safia is going to have to visit her grandparents more!

Dinner with Leo

Rube and my mom left Sunday, but Safia and I stayed in New York/New Jersey until Wednesday.  For the first half of the trip we stayed with my friend Amanda, for the second half of the trip we stayed with family friends.  We had a great time hanging out, catching up, and playing with their amazing kids.  On Tuesday Safia got to spend the morning with her Great Aunt Kathy and Uncle Richard while I worked, and then we headed to New Jersey to spend the night with Great Fish (my Aunt Trisha) and her family.  It was a whirlwind trip, but lots of fun, and once again Safia proved herself to be a great traveller.

Playing with the big kids (Iris and Leo)

Safia is getting more and more mobile.  She has a cart of blocks she loves to push around.  She actually likes to push around anything that she can, chairs seem to come in a close second to her cart.  She is talking up a storm.  Her intonation, inflections, and facial expressions indicate to us that she definitely is having a conversation, with who, we're not sure, and we have no idea what she's saying, but she sure does love to talk.  She is finding other ways to communicate with us.  She's mastered the baby sign for all done, she shakes her head "no" when she doesn't want something, and she claps when she's excited, which is often.  When she claps she hits the palm of her left hand onto the back of her right hand, which is exceedingly cute.  She still loves to eat, although she is getting more opinionated about what she wants to eat.  She's started eating off our plates more, which has lead to such discoveries as she loves blue cheese.  We still haven't found anything she doesn't like, hopefully this will continue!

One moment in Time

Safia at 9 months

Safia at 10 months

Nothing cuter than overalls and pigtails!

It seems that every month, every week, sometimes everyday, we are negotiating some sort of transition and change.  Once we seem to have it all figured out, or at least somewhat figured out, things change.  This past month entailed some pretty big changes that sent us all in a tailspin of transition and re-negotiation.  We all weather the storm in various degrees of sanity, most of this change was brought about by the fact that I went back to work.  The flexibility in my schedule allowed me to put Safia in daycare part-time, while I’m doing a “full-time” job, somehow that doesn’t totally add up, but we’re figuring it out.  She had been in daycare at Arrow Monday and Wednesday mornings, so we just added two full days (Tuesday and Thursday) at the new University Childcare Center. 

When I first went back to work, I got lots of sympathetic comments along the lines of, “oh it must be so hard to have her in daycare” or “I didn’t recognize you without that baby on your hip” or simply “how are you holding up?”  I wasn’t sure how to answer the inquires, because I was glad to be back.  Don’t get me wrong, I love my daughter, and I love spending time with her, but I also like what I do, and I like not being defined as just a mother.  I have nothing but the utmost respect for those women who choose to stay home because they want to (not so much for those who stay home because they think they should), as well as those women who would love to stay home, but for whatever reason (mostly financial) have to work.  But staying home is not for me.  Rube and I have discussed it - he has expressed interest in being a stay-at-home dad, so I just need to make a little more money so we can make that work.  At the same time, I know that I’m really lucky.  I got to stay home with Safia until she was nine months, and even though it’s hard, she’s not in daycare full time.  I also think that being back at work has actually made me a better mother.  I’m more patient with her, most of the time.  I try to be present with her when we’re together, which doesn’t always work (for example, much to her dismay, I’m typing this now, not playing with her, and believe me, she’s letting me know she’s not happy about that choice!).  I enjoy the time I spend with her more because I know I’m not with her all day, everyday.

That’s in no way to say that it’s been an easy transition. We’ve spent the last month trying to figure out how to function on less time with just as much to get done. No one warned us how much time it takes to get her stuff ready for daycare. There are many days when, by the time Rube and I finally have a chance to breathe, it’s nine o’clock and we’re ready for bed. When the weekend comes, sometimes it takes all our energy to just do something fun. We’ve also had to figure out how to remember to take time for each other in the midst of all the things that have to be done. That means that the dishes are not always done, the house is not always clean, the dog is not always walked (poor Zoey!). We’re trying to make peace with these new realities and enjoy what we do have.

He used to double fist beers, now he
double fists babies, how times have changed!

All things considered, we’ve adapted and are figuring out how to make it all work and still have some fun along the way. We spent the weekend in the mountains with friends, and it was amazingly beautiful and an awesome time. Unfortunately, Safia decided that this was a good time to get sick for the first time, and puked all over her crib. Rube decided that Safia couldn’t show him up and he got sick as well, so the weekend ended in sick exhaustion, but it was still fun! Safia also went to her first demonstration/rally. To celebrate Martin Luther King Day, the Newtown Florist Club holds a march and rally. We were late so we missed the march, but had a great time at the rally. Yet another first she celebrated was her first Chinese New Year. We feasted down on traditional fare and read her informational and entertaining books about the festivities. Rube also decided that the transition wasn’t hard enough, so he got a toothache which was discovered to necessitate a root canal which, in the end, necessitated his tooth being pulled. To say it was painful is an understatement. We were all glad to have the tooth gone and Rube back!

In other news, Safia got her two top teeth. She had a few grumpy days when they were coming in, but she now seems to be liking her increased biting abilities. She still loves to eat and has been eating lots of different things and has yet to indicate a dislike for anything. The weather here has been uncannily warm, so we have been trying to take advantage of the weather as much as possible with lots of time outdoors. We played Frisbee golf with friends and made our first attempts at putting Safia to bed at someone else’s house, and transfer her home so we could go to a Super Bowl party. Safia is crawling all over the place and really wants to walk. She pulls herself up on everything and has a knack for getting into the one thing in the room she really shouldn’t be playing with. We finally (just took us 9 months) set up her room so that it’s really her room. All of her toys are in there, as well as her changing table and all her clothes. Rube and I can’t seem to get over how big our room is now that all her stuff is out of it! She also really seems to be liking daycare. One of the women who takes care of her even described her as ‘independent,’ ‘laid back,’ and ‘easy going!’ We’re all shocked and amazed at how far we’ve all come!

I think these two are going to be trouble, if only
we could read her mind!

Practicing her walking skills, I think
she might run before she walks!

Practicing disc golf, it was 75 degrees in
February, had to be outside

Playing in her newly decorated room

Happy New Year!

We’re back in Athens.  Our return trip, accomplished in 11½ hours, was another rousing success.  We even discovered a fantastic taqueria just off the highway in Durham, NC that will undoubtedly become our halfway-there lunch spot for future Athens-DC excursions.  We are now staring down the last two days of freedom left in our winter break.  I go back to work on Monday, Ellen will be getting ready to return to full-time PhD work and teaching, and Safia will begin a two-days-a-week daycare.  We’ve come to notice, quite acutely, just how profoundly life’s transitions affect our day-to-day functioning. 

While we were in DC for the winter holiday, Safia did some growing up.  She continues to make progress on her “crawling.”  She is not yet on hands and knees, but is getting increasingly proficient at getting to where she needs to get.  She is getting more comfortable on two feet, and just loves to tentatively explore the world of bipedalism, mostly with shrieks of wonder and giggles.  Safia has also learned to wave hello and goodbye – quite possibly the cutest thing I’ve ever seen. 

Ellen and I, as always, are trying to figure out Safia’s sleep patterns.  We seemed to have things under control before we left to DC, but predictably, right when we arrived, her sleeping routine got all discombobulated.  Trying to go off her cues, we noticed that she might be trying to consolidate her three naps-a-day to two naps.  Logically, if she consolidates naps, the naps she takes should get somewhat longer to accommodate.  Her naps, however, are no longer – 30 minutes on the average.  So that leads us to wonder what in the world is going on.  She has also had a harder time going to sleep at night, likely the result of only sleeping a combined one-hour throughout the day.  We have conceded that traveling is hard on babies, and once we get settled back into familiar routines and spaces, she should settle into a rhythm.  That doesn’t mean it isn’t hard, though.

Anyway….this is the last post of the year.  We hope all is well with all our loved ones and friends that have supported us through this crazy, crazy new experience.  Thanks for the advice, babysitting, listening ears, food, laughs, drinks, hand-me-down clothes, sympathy, empathy, and loving hugs.  See you all in 2012!

Made it!

Safia at 8 months

Safia was a complete rock star.  I can say, with all honesty, that the prospect of driving from Athens, GA to Washington DC with an 8 month old was completely daunting.  Sure, we had done it before, but she was a very different baby then.  Last time we did it, she was a mere 3 months old - different sleep patterns, different eating patterns, different awake activities.  Now, at 8 months, we were dreading a scream-fest and were now willing (however reluctantly) to entertain the idea that this drive may have to be broken into two days.  We strapped Safia into her car seat and were on the road at 7am, and she screamed endlessly, certainly a message to us that she was the captain of this ride.  After 45 solid minutes of wailing, a breakfast feeding in the car seat, and a quick stop for breakfast biscuits for us adults, we all settled in for the haul, and Safia did great.  What is ordinarily a 10 hour drive, sans baby, was accomplished in just over 11 hours and we couldn't have been more delighted.  We arrived in DC to happy grandparents and aunt, a crazy dog rumpus, and fabulous Thai food.  Let the relaxing begin.

We arrived here in DC on Monday, and we'll be here about another week.  We have indulged, gluttonously in great food and company.  We are being spoiled by the generous babysitters that watch after Safia so Ellen and I can recall, for brief and fleeting moments, what life was like before we had the responsibilities of child rearing.  Urgent baby yowls and yelps at 5-in-the-morning, however, quickly return us back to reality, but having so many willing and helping hands around has made all the difference.

Since we last wrote here (and it has been an exceedingly long time, sorry) there are many new Safia-related things to report on.  She continues to not be the greatest napper, but we take what we can get.  She is not quite a proficient crawler, but she is army-crawling like a champ.  Really, what she wants to do is walk.  It seems she is determined to bypass that whole crawling thing and just move around like everyone else.  She has learned she can pull herself up and can stand, wobbly and shaky, but proud as can be.  Safia is also still a champion eater - devouring shocking amounts of food, and we're now working on self-feeding.  Safia is still very clingy, but her new-found love of locomotion has afforded us some freedom from the cling.  That's about it...below are some of our favorite pictures from the past month (including a Thanksgiving feast with my mom and brother).  Hope all is well where you are, and Happy Holidays!